Boyett Babble Time: It doesn't take much...

It doesn't take much for me to start really missing Chad and thinking about so many things from the past and think about things that will never be. Don't get me wrong, I'm not feeling sorry for myself, just missing my son.
I can hear a song, or have a conversation with someone that some random thought pops into my head and if I'm not careful the tears will just start flowing.
I love talking about him and sharing stories of all our "Chadisms" (and there are a lot). The other day I was talking to Stacy on the phone and we were basically having a 3 way conversation with Tebo in the background and somehow (I don't know how) we got on to marijuana for minicible reasons and I said, we could always pull out Chad's old Bob Marley t-shirt and you could wear that. LOL! I was listening to my iPod the other day and a Bob Marley song came on that he loved (and yes, it was actually one mom could listen to). Tia was telling us the other night that she was thinking about him, because she was listening to her iPod and Lil Wayne came on (not exactly one mom could listen to) and it made me smile knowing our kids think of him like that too. I believe when Candi asked Tia what she was listening to she said some of Chad's music and she immediately said, is it Lil Wayne? She said, yep! I love that. I love that they will talk about him and remember him. Sometimes it scares me that they may just forget about him and others might forget things about him and I don't want him to be forgotten just because he isn't on this earth.
When Tebo got me my new vehicle I struggled all the way home from OK City, because all I could think about was calling Chad to tell him all about it and knowing he would love it. It's little things like that, that sometimes can catch you off guard a little bit, but also brings a little smile to my heart knowing that he is remembered.
When I hear people tell stories about the stages their kids are in I automatically go right to that stage with Chad and I will say, nearly every memory (with the exception of the ones where he got hurt) puts a smile on my face and I allow myself to go back to that time in life and just stay there for a bit so I can soak it all in again.
I thought I would capture a few happy moments to just allow myself the chance to smile today and remember my sweet boy and hopefully put a smile on someone else's face when they hear some of his cute and funny moments.
When he was less than 2 years old he would play his guitar and had a cowboy hat on and singing his little heart out with his microphone. He loved country music at the time and Garth Brooks and Allen Jackson were his favorites. When she sang a Garth song he wore his black cowboy hat and wore his white one when he sang Allen Jackson songs (Wanted being his favorite). Well, he was going through a stage where he would tell you something was on fire. He claimed his room was on fire one day and it just went from there. One day we were getting ready to go somewhere and he said the microwave was on fire. I said, Chad you cannot continue saying that so I sent his father in there to just make sure all was ok and I hear all this commotion and sure enough, the microwave was on fire! He put his microphone in the microwave and turned it on (it will happen every time)...
Then as he got a little older and we were living in AR he acquired a new nickname from BoBo (who else) of "Jeffery". Stacy use to be our "go getter" whenever someone needed something, but now that Chad was older and the baby of the group he because our "go getter" so daddy nicknamed him "Jeffery". He even bought him a fishing tackle box with "Jeffery" written on it. It was hilarious. As soon as Peanut was old enough Chad was happy to retire his reign. :)
Then came the roller blade stage.... Let's just say this was one of those memories that ended up hurting him and not his finest moments, but that boy loved it and was amazingly good at it. It scared me to death with how high he would get on those ramps (and yes I was one of those parents that had a huge ramp in my yard) so needless to say I was never so glad to get out of that stage. Of course, that meant it was time to start driving. Oh my! He was actually pretty good, but it's amazing how a parent's worry could actually increase when we already worry like we do, but just let your child get a driver's license and suddenly the worry quadruples. It's unreal!
Of course, I say that and then you have boot camp come along so maybe I should have just enjoyed the driving worries a bit more. :)
He was amazing. He loved me and made sure I knew it. During our mother/son dance at his wedding reception he chose the perfect song ("I Hope you Dance" by Lee Ann Womack). I always told him I wanted that song played at my funeral for him and all my nieces and nephews and I had no idea he was going to chose that for our dance. It meant so much to me, but what meant even more was the conversation we had during our dance. Of course I was crying and he said it's ok mom. You aren't losing me, you are just gaining a daughter. I said I know son, but it feels like it will just be so different, he reassured me that nothing would change with us and that he will always be there and I told him the same. I really think we talked throughout the entire song (I know, shocker huh?). It was probably one of our best conversations and one I will never forget. He made me feel like the most loved mom in the world in just a few minutes of a song.
He was so good to call me every day either from work or on his way home from work unless he was in the field. I truly was very blessed. If I could have picked any child in the world to be my son I couldn't have done a better job than him. I'm certain had I been given that chance he would have been my choice every time.
Life will certainly never be the same, but I do plan to spend the rest of my days on this earth remembering Chad and making a difference in the lives that touched him and even for those that never had the privilege of knowing him personally, they too will know him and be touched by him. That I am certain about.
Enjoy a few pictures and a couple of songs that he liked (I will only share the ones all moms can hear)... :)
Songs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wa9w5VFfhao&ob=av2e Allen Jackson's Wanted

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo4OnQpwjkc Bob Marley's Don't Worry be Happy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RV-Z1YwaOiw&ob=av2e Lee Ann Womack's I Hope You Dance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdB-8eLEW8g Bob Marley's One Love

Think about my Chadman when you hear these songs.

Pictures: