Fall is in the air

This time of year is tough regardless and has been since December 1, 2010 and I imagine it always will be, but today I went to the cemetery at lunch and couldn't help but miss the stories that would have been.  It use to drive me crazy that my youngest sister, Stacy, and Chad would fight/compete to get the most fish when fishing and honestly, they acted more like brother and sister than aunt and nephew.  I won't lie, I would give anything to listen to them fight right now, but it wouldn't be over fishing right now.  They would be fighting/competing over deer!  I never really thought I would have that sentence with my sister in it, but it's true.  She has allowed her redneck/country blood show more this year than past.  It's actually kind of funny, but again, I would give anything to hear them arguing over spots or who was going to get the first deer or who gets the biggest.
As I was at the cemetery today I realized that I was so impatient for the grass to finally grow in around his headstone and be pretty that I forgot with all that grass there was no way for me to see the deer tracks at his spot like we did last year.  It made me tear up, because I know hunting would be the biggest thing on his mind right now as he would be a civilian right now. 
Tebo and I participated in a Veteran's celebration at Chad's best friend's wife's nursing school on Monday and Clint came.  He was running a few minutes late, because just as Billy left he shot a deer and he had to track it so he would know where to go once the ceremony was over.  When he left he grabbed Chad picture from their wedding that Emily had placed next to our table and he asked her if she wanted it in her car or his truck.  I said you might as well take him with you, because you helped him your fair share dragging a deer out of the woods.  He laughed and said you are right so he took Chad right along with him to bring his deer out of the woods. 
This time of year is tough.  It always will be, but I will do my best to always find a way to bring him into my day and have a smile as I think of the storeis that would be right now.
Momma misses her baby boy more than words could ever express and I hope it never gets easier to do so... that would just be terribly sad.